Time

I had to bring little Melanie some milk this morning...I seem to have forgotten to leave her enough yesterday. Not sure WHAT I was thinking, obviously I wasn't! While I was sitting bedside another baby was brought into our nursery. It caused me to think back to 3 weeks ago this morning. I tried to remember when I first saw Melanie for the first time, and I can't. I know I had to wait for what felt like FOREVER for my body temperature to come back up; I was wrapped in heated blankets and even put in a plastic bag (do not try this at home). But after that I don't remember....I don't remember if I was on my stretcher or in a wheel chair...I don't remember my first thoughts...I don't remember if I was anxious or amazed. I do remember seeing her in a bag to keep her warm (once again, do not try this at home). At times I wish I could go back and remember everything from those first hours; to record them somehow. I'm also thankful that those first hours are such a blurr. I was flipping back through some charts and saw some of her stats from the first couple days of life and they were not great!! I'm sure if I knew those stats then I would have been very scared. All of this shows me once again the Lord will not give us more than we can handle. There is a reason we cannot know the future, there is a reason we can't always remember the details of a trying time.

As for now, I'm trying to remember every detail and emotion of what's going on with Melanie. Time is going so fast...it won't be long and she'll be moving up to the next diaper size...to her first preemie outfit...to her first non-preemie outfit (okay that may be months away). I know this isn't the ideal situation, but I am so thankful for all we have learned and experienced thus far. It's only been three weeks...but it's been an amazing three weeks; the fastest three weeks of my life. What will the next three weeks hold? Only God knows, and He'll revel it to us in His perfect timing.